THIRD REMINDER. Monday. Tips for marriage couple continues. BismilLahir Rahmaanir Raheem. Please read the first/second Reminders first before reading this one and if you didn't receive any, please request for a copy Issues on Parenting*: The tug of war that results from differing understandings of parenting are also a source of tension in marriage. One solution is to start learning about Islamic parenting before having children. If you already have kids, you can still learn. Issues on Stress: Stress is an almost constant factor in most people's lives in the world today. Muslim couples are no exception. Stress from work, for example, is carried into the home. Couples and families need to work out a coping mechanism in the family. For instance, couples can take a walk to talk about the day or go to the Masjid for at least one prayer. They can read Quran individually or together. The methods can vary, but as long as they are Halal and work, they can be used. Issues on Domestic violence: This is an extremely sad reality and unless it is dealt with promptly by victims, perpetrators and/or those concerned about the two, then the family will break. Seeking help is necessary and if domestic violence is not stopped, the destructive effects will not only be harmful to the husband and wife, but to their children as well. Family members, friends and Imams need to stop the abuse. They must intervene and work on getting help for the husband and the wife. Issues on Sexual dysfunction: This is one of the least talked about problems, but it is one that is wreaking havoc in a number of marriages. Many couples who are marrying are not learning the Islamic perspective on sex and marriage. As a result, when they are not satisfied with their spouse, a number of them may turn to others or seek easy divorce, instead of a solution. Couples have to understand that the marital relationship in this area, as in others, needs work and patience and cannot be the subject of whims and impatience. Knowledge, practice and if possible, the advice of a wise, compassionate scholar are two key elements in finding a solution to this problem. Issues on Interfaith marriages. Islam forbids marriage between Muslim women and non-Muslim men. There are a number of Muslim women who have taken this step and regretted it later so please don't even try it. Issues on Intercultural marriages While Islam does not forbid intercultural marriages, they can become a source of tension when Muslims, primarily the couple, but also their families, make their culture more important than Islam. If parental support is there for an intercultural marriage, things are smoother for the couple. If there is not, and if there is even hostile opposition on the part of one or both sets of parents, it could be better to not marry the person in the long run. May Allah keep guiding us all and protect us from any satanic influences. Aameen